A few months ago I got incredibly high with a friend, and we got in to this ridiculous argument about whether or not I’d be proud if Lauren Conrad from The Hills was my daughter. The argument quickly somehow morphed into whether or not a woman would bang you if you threw out the first pitch in game one of the world series. Anyway, my answer to the first question was no. The reason I said no, is because if I was talking to other parents about her, what would I say? “Oh, my daughter’s so talented, she’s really good at… well, she’s got a show on tv where
